A series of mini-dramas based on public conversations, as overheard and rewritten by local playwright/director Aurora Stewart de Peña.

Overheard outside of the Fresh and Wild on Spadina at King

Rob, in his early 20s, wears beige pants that are too large, a golf shirt that’s too big, and sneakers shaped like marshmallows with red laces. He is wearing a tightly woven, industrial-strength nylon neckband around his neck. Attached to it is a nametag with the words “Rob,” “TVO,” and “Fundraising.” He holds a clipboard.

Alia, mid-40s in formal office wear, approaches. She clicks her heels against the pavement. Rob jumps in her path, as would a coyote intercepting a field mouse.

Rob: Hi, how are you today?

Alia: I’m fine.

Rob: That’s good, have you heard of Polka-roo?

Alia: What?

Rob: [in a high-pitched voice] Polka-roo!

Alia: Oh.

Rob nods rapidly.

Rob: Kids today are watching all sorts of garbage, my little niece, she’s about three, her favourite show is about kids her age in tiaras. Toddlers in Tiaras is what it’s called, and it’s garbage. She sits in front of that TV for hours and do you know what her ambition is?

Alia looks at Rob.

She wants to be a contestant in a junior beauty pageant. Hello! Goals? Ambitions? They’re not there. Her other favourite show, and this is even worse, I think, is Million Dollar Match Maker. That woman? Heinous. She doesn’t know what love is.

I told my sister, you better get her in front of something good or she is going to turn out just like one of those reality TV stars that she loves so much. And that is what’s going on with most of our kids today. They’re sitting in front of reality TV, eating Cheezies, losing their minds because everything’s so stupid.

Pause.

And what are you doing about it? There are good shows on, shows like Polka-Dot-Door and other shows, shows that teach kids something, shows that show kids how to be, and how to learn and grow, but those shows need your support.

And crime is rising, did you know that? And the less education kids have, the more crime rates go up because kids don’t have access to the ideas that they need to learn that they could be anything!

And for a donation of just $10 a month, you could keep good shows on the air. Shows that give kids ideas, TV that gives kids hope. Does that sound like something you could do?

Pause.

Does it?

Pause

Does it?

Alia: I’m sorry, my English isn’t very good.

Alia smiles at Rob, then continues up the street.

Rob: Then why’d you stand there for so long?

Fine, then. Go buy some more clothes.

____

Aurora Stewart de Peña is half of the theatre company Birdtown & Swanville (the other half is Nika Mistruzzi). You can follow her on Twitter at @Aurorahhh.

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