Everyday we see thousands of faces. But what are the stories behind those faces? Kathleen Phillips gives her best estimate.
Raymond Troy – The Daily Double
Being a successful bigamist takes confidence and impeccable timing according to expert two- timer, Raymond Troy. Troy (not his real name) manages his double life and dual wives with the finesse of Elvis Stojko ice dancing to Collin James. Of course, a dawg’s life is not an easy one. “It’s a ton of work making sure your wife doesn’t find out about your other wife,” says Raymond. But like anything worth doing, practice makes perfect. Raymond has been double fisting matrimony for nearly fifteen years going strong. “When it comes to married life I like options and when it comes to clothes, I only wear denim. I’m weird that way,” admits Troy, “But at the end of the day there are two women who, for all they know, love me like crazy and that’s pretty unique.”
Louise Rodrigues – This Little Piggy Goes to Drama School
Pedicurist, Louise works hard for the money and frankly, the money sucks. Living hand to mouth is harder to swallow when you’ve been massaging corns all day, but Louise doesn’t complain. Louise is happy knowing that by the time her 10 year-old son, Wayne is 18, she’ll have squirreled away enough money to send him to a university acting program. “Wayne has assured me that once he gets his dramatic education, we will never worry about money again and I believe him. He’s very believable.” Right now Wayne is rehearsing for his grade-five class production of “The Truth About Sleeping Beauty,” a play about mono. “I have no doubts that Wayne will shine as the Witch,” says Louise, “He is very convincing as a woman.”
Gwen Oates – Peas Porridge HOT!
Gwen Oates a.k.a, “DJ Porridge” is a club DJ. She’s serious draw at hot spots around the city like, “Chocolate Bar” and the “Pubic Zone.” Gwen has been mixin’ and scratchin’ since Deborah Harry invented Rap Music. Gwen has scratched on albums for the likes of Phat Slacks, Jube Jube Sound System and Bozo Brains. Gwen is a famous sneaker head. She has over 1500 pairs of Reebok walking shoes. When asked how, at the age of 83, she finds the energy to push it to the max every night, Gwen replies, “Goji Berry Juice.”
Kathleen Phillips is a writer and comedian based in Toronto. Follow her on Twitter @kathophillips
Kristan Klimczak is a photographer working in Toronto. Follow her on Twitter @MarylouFlamingo