I tried to get somebody else to write about this ad, but everyone immediately began swallowing broken glass and pulling out their own nails and I couldn’t get them to type.

So I’m going to turn proceedings over to that elite club of people who are qualified to call themselves YouTube commenters.

True, for the most part YouTube comment threads are a gleaming cabinet that showcases mankind’s boundless capacity for ignorance, stupidity and something that is either insecurity or evil, I’m not sure which.

But it seems that when there is a greater evil, idiotkind can pull itself together.

The ad in question is by PHD Global, a media agency (the guys who negotiate and purchase placements for ads) owned by Omnicom Group.

Here it is. Try to make it through 30 seconds. Go on, little bunny.

OH BUNNY YOUR EYES WHY ARE THEY BLEEDING?

YouTube, take it away:

willposkett123: this is? why media agencies should NEVER do creative.

robertholsman: Possibly the worst marketing strategy since someone at VW suggested “Its What The Fuhrer Would Drive”

cooljules19: I understand now. This video is actually an? Al-Qaeda recruitment video

SiN3MATIC: “Mass blocks kill brands overnight” -? not only is this my favourite of these stomach-churning lines, but it’s probably the most ironic

somebody: Insane, patronising ads scripted by Nathan Barley as he approaches middle? age will kill brands overnight.

divisivecottonwood: Has anybody reported the company? behind this video to the NSPCC? It shouldn’t be allowed in a civilised society

jamieblack101: George Orwell had nothing on this God-awful bleak vision of humankind’s future: where the greatest desire of children is for really, really good marketing. This video? makes me want to sit in the corner and sob. I feel sad.

somebody: This would be the same PHD who have a website that is copyrighted 2009 and fails to use any form of social media on their site and claims thought leadership. Some way to go yet.

kathmonkey: *shudder* You’re right, kids, I haven’t seen anything like you yet. And if you’re the future, we’re all doomed. Right, I’m off to create a rocket that will save me from this dystopian horror by firing me and my family into the centre of the sun? – anyone wanna join me?

jp130793: The kid’s smile? at 0:25 is hateful.

stantheautomator: The black girl with the long hair has 3 different voices throughout the video.?

SportEquation: a bullet to the head would have given me? more pleasure then watching these kids be abused by powers they dont understand

vickylouise1987: This is a true disappointment. Whatever happened to the pure, simple genius of “A media company that always places your? ads in the same place”?? PHD seem to have forgotten that people don’t like being treated like idiots.

nevilled83: Anyone else love the irony of the ‘up your game’ message?

crazymaraca: To the OP: No apology needed. You’ve provided a fascinating insight into how the marketing? industry views our children, as a cheap exploitable commodity.

illimey: Blimey, so many things wrong with this it’s difficult to know where to start. Straight away, it commits the cardinal sin of confusing advertising with marketing. Secondly, theres such an undercurrent of smug hubris — that is entirely unwarranted — that this agency actually knows what the? kids of today will want in 5-10 years, nor why that is important. Anyone who’s that smug and arrogant won’t be getting my ad dollars.

Wibble990: This has got to be some kind of spoof . These kids are clearly too young to fully understand the implications of what they are saying. It paints? some kind of dystopian dream where every intimate secret is known about each person as they are carefully manipulated by hi-tech advertising agencies to stimulate their desire to consume Hideous!

zolastic: 134,000 views and counting. I’ll wager some specky knob at PHD will claim that as as an overwhelmingly positive KPI. No, that’s 134,000 people that have seen into the depths of your souls and found a flaming pit of hellspittle.

dondoman: How future generations will laugh at us. Presuming there are any.

I’m actually beginning to think that phdworldwide2011 are a lot smarter than we give them credit for. Surely they must? have KNOWN the effect this clip would have on people. I can honestly say that in my 5+ years on Youtube this is THE most offensive clip I have ever seen. I look forward to more thought- provoking clips from phdworldwide2011 in future.

flidsticks: You’re? right, this is thought provoking; it provoked a lot of people to think ‘This is completely shit’.

sergethew: I WANT TO INTERACT WITH AN AD FOR TOILET BLEACH!! WHYYYY CAN’T I DO THIS??

Hawkblocker—a website of unbiased advertising reviews for men and women and other demographics. Hawkblocker.com: Ad reviews by the prey.