The zone. It’s presumably a good place when you’re there. In the zone you’re extraordinarily and unstoppably focused. Your motivation’s through the roof.
But then there are those individuals whose zones are threatening places. Gwyneth Paltrow’s zone seems like a place she gets to while sitting on the CMS for GOOP in her immaculate kitchen, whose island is made of the most expensive African granite (is that a real thing?) and if you try to distract her she yells at you using her own brand of expletives–“Margarine-cream-icing!”, “Wardrobe-without-a-steamer!”–and shakes and cries. Assuming, that is, that she is the one who updates the GOOP site. (Doubtful.)
Still, the celebrity who most famously enters his zone is Kanyeezy. If he’s interrupted in his zone, someone dies. And so the American government has devised a plan to educate the public about keeping him away from the zone. Kanye Zone is their product. In the flash game, one makes money by helping keep a moving Kanye head from entering his “zone.” Even Kanye West himself knows how dangerous his zone is. In “N*ggas In Paris” he spews repeatedly: “Don’t let me get in my zone.” It’s because he’s scared of what happens there.
[via Navneet Alang]
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Jessica Carroll is the Toronto Standard’s “Best Thing on the Internet Today” columnist. Follow her on Twitter at @jssckr.
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