Zombie-proofed home.
Monday’s election has completely reshaped Canada’s political landscape, and the results could reverberate for decades. All this was accomplished with the third-lowest voter turnout in Canadian history, although it was still an improvement on the last election. The bottom line: the 38.6 percent of eligible voters who stayed away have no right to complain until the next election.
So Harper finally won his majority, the NDP surged, the Liberals and Bloc collapsed. It was a heavenly night for political junkies.
Still, life goes on outside of politics. For those millions who were probably gaming all through Monday night, still more bad news. It seems that there were yet another 25 million Sony Playstation accounts hacked. That’s in addition to the 77 million hacks already acknowledged.
Police continue to hunt for the person who shot a puppy to death in Brampton over the weekend, while the family continues to mourn.
The fallout from the killing of Osama bin Laden continues. And while Pakistan’s air defences may have failed to notice the American helicopters, it seems a local blogger did. Who needs radar when you have Twitter?
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CONTEST
When Japan’s Liberal Democratic Party was defeated in 2009, after running the country continuously for almost 54 years, several members split off to form their own parties, including Your Party and the Sunrise Party of Japan. Perhaps disgruntled, disgraced members of our own Liberal Party of Canada might consider a similar move?
Thus, we are proud to launch our first official contest: Rename the LPC! So far the best prize we can think is a bag of oranges. But we promise to think of something better.
Here are a few ideas to get you started:
The Good Loser Party
Iggy! Iggy! Iggy! Oi! Oi! Oi!
The New Liberal Democratic Party
The New New Liberal Democratic Party
The Reform Party
The Centrally Centrist Party
Fortress Rosedale
The Toronto Lawn and Tennis Club
Carolyn Bennett’s Crimson Rump?
The Rae-ging Bulls
liberalz
Xtreme liberalz 3000
The Natural Rebuilding Party
Send your entries to contact@torontostandard.com or tweet @TorontoStandard, or hashtag #renameLPC
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LOCAL
The so-called “Liberal fortress” of Toronto crumbled, overrun by blue and orange hordes. But does this mean Toronto has swung to the right? Sort of, but don’t get too excited, says the National Post.
In blue news of another sort, the Toronto police union has agreed to a tentative contract deal, easing worries of a labour dispute.
Those same police continue to look for witnesses to a murder in Rexdale over the weekend.
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THE LAST
If you’re worried the police may not be enough to protect you from the zombie invasion, there’s good news. This house can completely seal itself in concrete, and the only entrance is on the second floor over a drawbridge.
